night night.

havent took my meds today... not cos i dont want to, its just cos i havent had time... im shaking like a leaf :/ my blogs are all sad at the moment, but i just cant stop being sad, like i can smile, and pretend to be happy, but i feel empty inside. i dont know whats going on with me, i need to make my self another hospital appointment..i need to remember that. anyway, today i realised people give me a tiny slot of their lives, and then have nothing to do with me. including my mum. oh, i also found out today that what ever guy i like, like really like, somthing always keeps us apart so we cant be together, and well, thats getting to me a bit more now. man i want to move... how good would that be? fresh start... new people in my life, i could be who ever i wanted to be and they wouldnt know, i could even tell them i am healthy so they dont think of me diffrent... i like dreaming, anything could happen, i would like to live in a dream, that will be somthing i am in control of. night night.